*quote by Yves Saint Laurent
Hi I'm Sminks.
I never had pocket money as a child, I have also never owned sunglasses or a tracksuit as an adult-
...Both of the above statements may cause you to splutter your earl grey.
I'm not complaining don't worry- I just thought you might like to know that little smidgen of information, include it into your every day conversation or use it in a pub quiz you have my permission. (To be fair the pocket money one was quite sensible as I would have simply spent it all on chomps and tazzos.)
With my lack of regular pocket change as a child I was able to run around deliriously happy playing knocky knocky nine doors and pretending I was a teenage mutant ninja turtle (Michelangelo by the way).
Living in the North East of England and having lovely Northern parents that were quick to catch on that the best way to quiet a child bored on a rainy day was to stick it in front of paper and provide it with anything to use to draw with, I pretty much spent half my time either writing short and very dramatic novels that I was sure would also be movie scripts and I used all my crayolas drawing expensive and outlandish clothes.
Clothes.... oh the clothes!
I drew so many boob tubes, scrunchies and high heels from the ages of 9-10 I may have been able to rival any celebrity fashion line in today's standards. I even made my own catalogue for school friends to write orders in.
...Sometime between the introduction of poetry and the realisation that it didn't have to rhyme or make sense after a while I started to fade out the designs and began writing lyrics for Queen (Freddie had sadly died by this point, and the group were no more but I wouldn't let that stop me).
Of course between the time I am writing these words and the time I was doodling the latest amazing fashions for Kylie I have had many very disturbing and wonderful style evolutions. I had a perm, got my ears pierced and (if photographic evidence is correct) wore only a WWF t-shirt and leggings for a year and as much rave/ dayglo apparel as possible- I basically morphed into Clarissa explains it all. Only with a dodgy spiral perm.
So cool.
...And this was all before the hormones kicked in and I was old enough to even know what a rave was.
To tell you all the styles and non styles and 'what are you actually wearing' moments might be a little too much for one wee blog, lets just say that those designing days in the play ground certainly laid ground work for a whole scrapbook of amazing adventures in clothing, some parts of the scrap book were genius and some will be used as ransom for many years..
As recently as the beginning of last year I started another new stage of style evolution- I was not able to really describe or categorise the style I had begun to fumble my way though as to be honest it wasn't anything deliberate.
I had just lost a fair amount of weight and also lost the weight of moving from hotter part of the UK back to the glorious although much much colder North East. I owned sundresses and even 2 sunhats. I remember having to wear a weeks worth of clothing in one day layered for insulation.
It took me a year to stabilise my weight and actually be a size of clothing for long enough to buy anything worth holding on to, so it was plenty of time to simply buy anything and everything that could be cosy, cheap and eventually over sized. I quickly realised that supermarkets sell cheap clothing and I could also buy vegan chocolate at the same time...
I thrifted a fair bit- cherishing a pair of men's chinos that my boyfriend hated so much he wanted to burn them, then bury the ashes in a secret location. I wore them for about 3 months longer than I should have simply because I feared for their safety.
And so the Granny style stage of my evolution in fashion and style was born.. Slowly it grew from a mish mash of 'what I can afford now and wear now' to 'actually I quite like this- maybe I could get one with a bird on or a floral print'.
I call it Granny style, but perhaps that is an umbrella that covers many terms.. It certainly holds a lot of obscure pattern and colour combinations that would send on OAP swooning and reaching for the pension book, but it also has a kind of hyper active toddler aspect to. I think the first time it all clicked together was when I heard the ever adorable Kurt from Glee explain Rachels style-
Rachel somehow manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time. – Kurt
Colour, pattern, bows, twinsets, broaches, flats, knee socks, and Mary Janes...
In a perfect world I think I would be able to dress like this every day, but as my day job has certain clothing rules and because I have to resist wearing plaid and some kind of matching twinset in pale lavender.. *sigh*. I must be selective with my wardrobe. I still maintain my style but adapt to my surroundings.
So you're curious now huh? Want to dip your orthopaedic shoes into the wonderful world of whatever I am wearing?
And so the Granny style stage of my evolution in fashion and style was born.. Slowly it grew from a mish mash of 'what I can afford now and wear now' to 'actually I quite like this- maybe I could get one with a bird on or a floral print'.
I call it Granny style, but perhaps that is an umbrella that covers many terms.. It certainly holds a lot of obscure pattern and colour combinations that would send on OAP swooning and reaching for the pension book, but it also has a kind of hyper active toddler aspect to. I think the first time it all clicked together was when I heard the ever adorable Kurt from Glee explain Rachels style-
Rachel somehow manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time. – Kurt
Colour, pattern, bows, twinsets, broaches, flats, knee socks, and Mary Janes...
In a perfect world I think I would be able to dress like this every day, but as my day job has certain clothing rules and because I have to resist wearing plaid and some kind of matching twinset in pale lavender.. *sigh*. I must be selective with my wardrobe. I still maintain my style but adapt to my surroundings.
So you're curious now huh? Want to dip your orthopaedic shoes into the wonderful world of whatever I am wearing?
The Granny Style rules
...In no particular order
1. What would Emma Pillsbury wear? If Emma approves of the outfit then it is acceptable
Emma Pillsbury is the fictional guidance councillor from a TV show- more importantly from the really badly addictive TV show 'Glee'. I remember seeing her on the screen and swooning over her choice of accessories and the hair- THE HAIR.. that amazing auburn flick! Being a stylist on that show is almost like being Merlin and Tabitha (Bewitched).. you are that magical.
2. Layers
Every outfit is instantly better with a scarf, a cardie, another scarf, perhaps a necklace, some gloves, an over sized cardie and finally a attachable collar. You are always snug in 'Granny'. Tights and socks. Legwarmers. Scarfs out the wazzoo.
3. Collars are important
Peter pan, embellished, crocheted, and always highlighted with a broach or perhaps some snappy collar chain dodad. Oh to own a floral print dress with a sailor collar..
Advanced collar love- Check out the blog with all the collars
4. Print, colour and pattern.
If you are the black, black, a smidge more black type of dresser then prepare to update your wardrobe. 'Granny' is all about loving the whole spectrum of colour-and sometimes in the same outfit. I wouldn't say there are any colours to shy away from but I will say there are shades that just don't quite gel well with comfortable shoes- neons mainly. Embrace florals, spots stripes, plaid, checks and even animal print (bonus points if there are actual prints of pictures of animals).
Advanced pattern love- The most amazing fringe you will ever wish was yours= Stella
Of course I can write about the whats and the whose and hows and whatnot's but I think this blog is long enough and I think I may need to go and watch some Glee, crochet a collar and perhaps plan a trip to The land inside Stellas wardrobe (obviously there would be cooler coats to wear than the ones provided for Narnia)
See you in a bit.
you have made my day .... giggle
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